I've been promised a box of chocolates from a fellow professional if I can turn round the awful behaviour of a child she's referring to my class. Well, I love a challenge! She has doubts that I can manage this one!!
I've seen this little boy before. I did an observation in his class because the teacher was having such a hard time managing the children. She wanted advice -- she wasn't very experienced and hadn't had any behaviour management training. The observation wasn't good, and I quickly picked up that although there were 3 other adults in the room, there wasn't any strategy about which adult was doing what... No cohesion, adult control or routine.
Things were ok to begin with, but then the little lad who's now coming to my classes started. Fairly minor stuff at the start - wriggling around, poking other children - but what did the adults do? Nothing... Hm, this was going to be interesting. This was followed by him rolling onto the floor and disappearing out of reach under the table. Behaviour can deteriorate very quickly - all this in about 2 minutes from the start of the lesson! Before they could fish him out he was up and out of the door! There had to be some adult action now, surely? Quite slowly, an adult raised herself from her chair and went after him... No real rush though!
I went too, hearing a banging from the area as I was approaching. He was banging a toilet door, but still the adult did nothing, just watching him being totally defiant. I asked her what she was going to do. Looking a little flustered she told me that she didn't really know and her body language told both the child and me that this was the case. He was so sure of himself and the power he had over this adult.
The teaching assistant lost her anxious look when I asked if she wanted me to show her what to do. How was she to know if she'd never been taught?
As the child glared at me, challenging and defiant, I reached out, held the door and took his hand. Quite briskly but softly I told him to come with me. He was surprised at an adult's assertiveness as I walked him back towards the classroom. I asked the other adult to go and sit by the door in the classroom. The child walked with me calmly - he wasn't quite sure what to do. Nothing was happening that would make him want to fight, so he just followed.
I took him into class to where the lady was sitting saying firmly, 'Sit on the floor next to that lady and don't move until she tells you to, do you understand?'
He looked at me with a slightly confused look on his face as he sat down on the floor.
'That's a good boy, now don't move.'
The rest of the adults were watching the situation with looks of disbelief and said that they couldn't believe that he was conforming as he never did so for them. 'Well,' I told them, 'he obviously can conform as that's exactly what he's just done.'
One of the boy's classmates, a girl who also behaved badly in class, watched with interest, wandered over to one of the adults and knowingly pointed towards me and said, 'Now, she's really good!'
This little girl had quickly assessed my ability to manage behaviour. Children know instinctively who is to be respected and has authority. And the rest of the adults who children realise can't manage them? They just run rings around them...
So what did I do that's so different and why is it so effective?
It's easy really once you know the techniques. My total confidence is instinctively recognised by children. I am totally consistent in my approach and know that the techniques always work. Children know who they have to behave for and who they have to take little notice of. When dealing with confident adults they happily hand over control to them, as the little boy today proved. He transformed from the, 'I'm taking no notice of you' child to the compliant, 'reasonably happy to oblige' one.
Understandably, children aren't going to be too keen to follow the rules when they've been allowed to get away with appalling behaviour for so long and the adults who allowed this are trying to take back control. It's vital that you persevere. Correct use of timing, body language, tone and attitude are essential. Anybody can learn to manage children's behaviour effectively -- read up on the techniques, practise and implement them consistently -- that's it..... - 31963
I've seen this little boy before. I did an observation in his class because the teacher was having such a hard time managing the children. She wanted advice -- she wasn't very experienced and hadn't had any behaviour management training. The observation wasn't good, and I quickly picked up that although there were 3 other adults in the room, there wasn't any strategy about which adult was doing what... No cohesion, adult control or routine.
Things were ok to begin with, but then the little lad who's now coming to my classes started. Fairly minor stuff at the start - wriggling around, poking other children - but what did the adults do? Nothing... Hm, this was going to be interesting. This was followed by him rolling onto the floor and disappearing out of reach under the table. Behaviour can deteriorate very quickly - all this in about 2 minutes from the start of the lesson! Before they could fish him out he was up and out of the door! There had to be some adult action now, surely? Quite slowly, an adult raised herself from her chair and went after him... No real rush though!
I went too, hearing a banging from the area as I was approaching. He was banging a toilet door, but still the adult did nothing, just watching him being totally defiant. I asked her what she was going to do. Looking a little flustered she told me that she didn't really know and her body language told both the child and me that this was the case. He was so sure of himself and the power he had over this adult.
The teaching assistant lost her anxious look when I asked if she wanted me to show her what to do. How was she to know if she'd never been taught?
As the child glared at me, challenging and defiant, I reached out, held the door and took his hand. Quite briskly but softly I told him to come with me. He was surprised at an adult's assertiveness as I walked him back towards the classroom. I asked the other adult to go and sit by the door in the classroom. The child walked with me calmly - he wasn't quite sure what to do. Nothing was happening that would make him want to fight, so he just followed.
I took him into class to where the lady was sitting saying firmly, 'Sit on the floor next to that lady and don't move until she tells you to, do you understand?'
He looked at me with a slightly confused look on his face as he sat down on the floor.
'That's a good boy, now don't move.'
The rest of the adults were watching the situation with looks of disbelief and said that they couldn't believe that he was conforming as he never did so for them. 'Well,' I told them, 'he obviously can conform as that's exactly what he's just done.'
One of the boy's classmates, a girl who also behaved badly in class, watched with interest, wandered over to one of the adults and knowingly pointed towards me and said, 'Now, she's really good!'
This little girl had quickly assessed my ability to manage behaviour. Children know instinctively who is to be respected and has authority. And the rest of the adults who children realise can't manage them? They just run rings around them...
So what did I do that's so different and why is it so effective?
It's easy really once you know the techniques. My total confidence is instinctively recognised by children. I am totally consistent in my approach and know that the techniques always work. Children know who they have to behave for and who they have to take little notice of. When dealing with confident adults they happily hand over control to them, as the little boy today proved. He transformed from the, 'I'm taking no notice of you' child to the compliant, 'reasonably happy to oblige' one.
Understandably, children aren't going to be too keen to follow the rules when they've been allowed to get away with appalling behaviour for so long and the adults who allowed this are trying to take back control. It's vital that you persevere. Correct use of timing, body language, tone and attitude are essential. Anybody can learn to manage children's behaviour effectively -- read up on the techniques, practise and implement them consistently -- that's it..... - 31963
About the Author:
Liz Marsden is an expert child behaviour management practitioner. She uses her expertise in her own classes and in mainstream schools. She uses her expertise to train teachers, trainee teachers, teaching assistants and parents to manage children's behaviour with confidence. Visit Liz's website where you can download her widely recommended book, Behaviour Bible, which will give you invaluable advice to improve your teaching management expertise.
