I often listen to adults talking about their ideas of dealing with children's behaviour - and their misconceptions... It's clear that so many adults have completely lost their way and are, without realising it, reneging on their duty to manage and guide children's behaviour.
It's considered unfashionable and not quite nice, but what we're actually talking about is adults disciplining children. Yes, it's not politically correct and considered unpleasant these days, but...
Well sorry folks but adults have got to get their act together and start doing what they should be doing to make sure kids are secure in the knowledge of how their world and society works.
And guess what? Sometimes this involves issuing consequences for bad behaviour. That's how the world works - or at least, that's how it should work... And kids have to learn to accept this fact.
And another guess what? When adults do this 'disciplining kids' properly the result is confident, happy and relaxed individuals who can manage independently and successfully in society.
Let me tell you what happened that instigated this latest onslaught on the relationship between kids and adults...
I attended a meeting about one of the kids in my class - major behaviour problems that have largely been resolved and he's due to go to senior school in a few months...
This little guy has made enormous improvements - the adults at the school have learned to manage his behaviour and he knows he can't behave the previous way without there being consequences. He's great about all this new discipline stuff - relaxed and managing confidently and independently. But, as is often the case, there are still problems at break times when there is less supervision. But, he knows the rules and what will happen if he behaves badly.
So, of course, senior school need to know this. And their reaction when told that if he misbehaved during breaks there would have to be consequences?
'Well, he could be sent to a designated room but I don't think he would like it!'
Oh dear me!! HE ISN'T SUPPOSED TO ENJOY THE EXPERIENCE!!! He'd be going there as a consequence for bad behaviour so liking it isn't what he's supposed to do...
Where has the idea come from that if kids behave badly then something pleasant should happen?? It's totally and utterly rubbish!! No wonder that adults have lost the plot so completely when dealing (or not dealing!) with kids' behaviour problems...
I'm nearly done... On a more serious note, it's not difficult to learn to deal with children's behaviour properly, making sure that you use consequences in a way that will have a positive impact. Simple strategies, work on them and put them into daily practise with total consistency! Nothing more than that - honestly! - 31963
It's considered unfashionable and not quite nice, but what we're actually talking about is adults disciplining children. Yes, it's not politically correct and considered unpleasant these days, but...
Well sorry folks but adults have got to get their act together and start doing what they should be doing to make sure kids are secure in the knowledge of how their world and society works.
And guess what? Sometimes this involves issuing consequences for bad behaviour. That's how the world works - or at least, that's how it should work... And kids have to learn to accept this fact.
And another guess what? When adults do this 'disciplining kids' properly the result is confident, happy and relaxed individuals who can manage independently and successfully in society.
Let me tell you what happened that instigated this latest onslaught on the relationship between kids and adults...
I attended a meeting about one of the kids in my class - major behaviour problems that have largely been resolved and he's due to go to senior school in a few months...
This little guy has made enormous improvements - the adults at the school have learned to manage his behaviour and he knows he can't behave the previous way without there being consequences. He's great about all this new discipline stuff - relaxed and managing confidently and independently. But, as is often the case, there are still problems at break times when there is less supervision. But, he knows the rules and what will happen if he behaves badly.
So, of course, senior school need to know this. And their reaction when told that if he misbehaved during breaks there would have to be consequences?
'Well, he could be sent to a designated room but I don't think he would like it!'
Oh dear me!! HE ISN'T SUPPOSED TO ENJOY THE EXPERIENCE!!! He'd be going there as a consequence for bad behaviour so liking it isn't what he's supposed to do...
Where has the idea come from that if kids behave badly then something pleasant should happen?? It's totally and utterly rubbish!! No wonder that adults have lost the plot so completely when dealing (or not dealing!) with kids' behaviour problems...
I'm nearly done... On a more serious note, it's not difficult to learn to deal with children's behaviour properly, making sure that you use consequences in a way that will have a positive impact. Simple strategies, work on them and put them into daily practise with total consistency! Nothing more than that - honestly! - 31963
About the Author:
Liz Marsden is a behaviour management expert who every day deals with children deemed unmanageable in their mainstream schools. She uses her expertise to train teachers, student teachers, teaching assistants and parents to prevent behaviour problems and escalations. Visit Liz's website to learn about her easy to use techniques and make your classroom or home stress free, enjoyable and productive.
